Three Years

The release of our album Chicago Onion Farm ca. 1900, marks three years of releasing a new album every month. That's a grand total of 36 albums, just under 24 hours of audio recorded between August 2013 and November 2018. Why on Earth would we do that? Well it was a mixture of necessity and insanity.

First a little background; our music is almost entirely improvised, so the way we create an album is a little different than the average band. We'll get together, jam for an hour or so, then I go through trim things down, do some basic mixing and mastering, give it a name, and call it an album. Now for a stretch of several years I had fallen behind on editing, which resulted in hours upon hours of music just sitting on my hard drive. So I finally decided to tackle the massive project of editing everything into albums and releasing them online.

The first album in this series was Saturnine Frequency Noir, released in early April of 2016. Shortly after this I lost my job and was unemployed for about 4 to 5 months. I treated this as the perfect opportunity to fully commit to the project, and made editing these jam session my full time job. I would wake up everyday, eat some food, and then edit for 6-12 hours straight. Except on the weekends, which were spent drinking at the beach. It was honestly the best summer I've ever had.

 I didn't initially plan to do monthly releases; in fact originally I believe I was planning on quarterly releases. However, as I began to realized the scope of project it became clear that releasing a few albums a year was not going to cut it. Starting off I had enough recordings for about 12 -18 albums, at that rate it would have taken me at least 3 years to release everything, not counting anything new we would record during that 3 year period. So I figured why not try putting out an album every month.

Flash forward three years and we're finally all caught up. Now we can return to a more leisurely release schedule.

But before that, a quick wrap up of the past few albums.







California Knock Out Party, released in November and Four Star Luxury, released in January are both improvised live performances. In both cases we had a show to play and not enough time to learn and rehearse a set list. We figured we would probably give a better performance if we improvised on the spot with no restrictions, rather than trying to adhere to a set list we barely knew. Admittedly we weren't flying completely blind. I programed a couple beats and melodies in advance to give us a base to sculpt our music on, and to keep the performances flowing. I'm also realizing while typing this that I haven't upload video of Four Star Luxury to our youtube yet, so expect to see that very soon.




Veterans of WWIII I think was a short jam session before rehearsing for a live set. This was originally planned to be part of another split album, but scheduling conflicts with the other band caused that idea to fall through. This may be a relatively brief album, but it's packed with a lot of new experiments and musical motifs. Take for example the melancholy synth guitar and bass sounds of "Lost Islands," playing a some what Latin inspired melody. Then there's the high energy rave orchestra hits of "Show Down in Gamelan Town" and "Fury of the Volcano Goddess." Even the version of "No Body Knows..." that closes this album has a very unique arrangement, unlike anything heard on any previous renditions.



That brings us to the grand finale of this series of albums, Chicago Onion Farm, ca. 1900, a solid release that sets the stage for the future of The Brown Christmas' sound exploration. While not actually the most recent thing we've recorded (that would be our Christmas album, which was recorded 2 months after this) it is still a good representation of the current direction of our music. A further distillation of techniques and themes that have been present in our music for awhile; catchy melodies and gentle ambiences along side walls of noise, creating flowing stream of consciousness style music. Tracks are concise but full of textural and tonal shifts, all while being an interconnected part of a larger experience. There is perhaps more use of layered pads and arpeggiation than past albums, and ...I want to say 'solo' shredding? This album is spacey, spooky, playful, triumphant, melancholic, and the perfect place to end our three year run. Expect us to expand more in these directions on future albums, but more important expect the unexpected.

Christmas and 2019

So here's our Christmas album, a collection of classic Christmas covers and original instrumental bits.  It's a really good Christmas album and the material on it is brand new, recorded less than a month before it was released. This one is pretty self explanatory, so instead I'll be talking about what 2019 holds for The Brown Christmas.

First and foremost, we're just about up to date with releasing all the new albums we have recorded. This March will be three years straight of releasing a new album every month, and I figure that's a good stopping point. We no longer have piles of recorded audio backing up our output pipeline; so if we were to continue at this pace we'd literally have to be recording, editing, and making art for a new album every month. Truthfully we probably could do that, but I'm not sure for how long without loosing our minds. This isn't to say we will no longer be releasing new albums; we'll just be slowing down to maybe one every few months, or basically whenever we have new material and time to edit it.

Not having a new Brown Christmas album to put out every month will also allow me time to shift my focus to some other projects. I'd like to go through all the music we've release these past three years and make some weird music videos to accompany some of the tracks. I'm also hoping to get our really early albums cleaned up and made available on our bandcamp, along with some bonus tracks.

Aside from Brown Christmas related stuff, I'm planning to start going through the hours upon hours of solo material I have recorded as Chalk Harmonica Vibe and gradually start trickling out albums for that project. There are also several new side aliases and collaborations I hope to release as well, including my newage/ambient project Bathroom Plants. So clearly there will be no shortage of musical output coming this year.

Get ready for new, exciting, strange sounds coming your way in 2019!

Almost Live Volume 3: Stop Making Cents (Playing catch up part 6)

Here we are, finally all caught up! As with the other two volumes this is a practice session for a live set we played, so there's not too much that can be said about it. There are new versions of several tracks originally from our album Hash Not Hash, https://thebrownchristmas.bandcamp.com/album/hash-not-hash

The one unique thing with this volume is that it opens with some actually live, and completely new recordings. We were setting up to play the show and were just planning to do a quick sound check. Well that sound check started sounding so good that we just kept going, next thing you know we have almost 15 minutes of new music. The soundcheck was not recorded on video, but the main performance can be seen here.
https://youtu.be/IyptQVJUYgA

Too Christmases (Playing catch up part 5)

This is a first for The Brown Christmas; a split album with fellow experimental synth weirdos Too Dogs. Our half is pulled from two practice session for live shows, where we went off script and wound up with a few new tracks. These make heavy use of Joemazing's guitar mangling skills and the percussive synth patches of the Korg Wavestation. They tend to start as dreamy phantasms that build to triumphant climaxes. There wasn't quite enough material here to make a proper album, so the obvious solution was to round things out with fresh songs from the hottest dogs in town.

Too Dogs' half was recorded and edited by yours truly, and provides the first (somewhat) polished presentation of these crazed canines who have until now, been doing mostly zany live sets. Buoyant synths and twangy guitars pour through pedals, taking the listener on a whimsically psychedelic voyage. Frenetic percussion programming is punctuated by a booming live drum kit, acting as the wiggling spine that supports the wash of sound.

Enjoy these two distinct flavors or experimental improvisation!

Some Kind of Birthday Party (Playing catch up part 4)

Party animals rejoice, it's Some Kind of Birthday Party! There is indeed good reason to celebrate; this is my favorite album we've released this year, and probably a new high water mark for The Brown Christmas. You know you're in for something truly special as Al Santillo introduces the album with the words; "Every slice got something different on it..." Each track is a different experience, with different flavors of synth patches spread across the whole album.

Seamlessly we slip from the electronica infused melodies and shattering grooves of "Neon Glass," to the gritty lo-fi sizzle of "Crystal Shards," and  the silly chaotic panic of "Hyper Train Rail Workers." Dreamy guitar ambiences and soothing synth sax playing on "Lunar March," contrast the harsh walls of noise on "Storms of Jupiter." Deep rumbles of feedback attempt to smother the listener; occasionally allowing a pensive breath of fresh air before attempting to suffocate you again. There are absolutely no lulls on this album, it constantly pushes forward with the purposeful energy of a charging rhinoceros.

What really sets this album apart however, is that it rocks. It rocks earnestly, it rocks hard, and it rocks the full way through. The shredding solo on "Hard Nights, Harder Dreams" has no business being so hard hitting and emotionally charged. Revel in Joemazings ability to take his synth from sounding like it's on it's last breath short circuiting, to then emerge with a victorious crisp lead line. Feel the high energy orchestra hits of "Get Fucked or Die Frying" and prepare for a head to head battle in a cloud of synth drones. Wrap things up with the forceful growls of "The Last White Rhino" with it's weeping marimba-like solo, and you've got an album that's good to the last slice.

The art work on this album is also my favorite of everything we've released this year. A fun combination of several techniques that have been used on previous covers. Bright and welcoming, while also surreal and disconcerting; Michael Burke knocks it out of the park again.

This album is also available on KRXMA Records, be sure to check it out there as well. https://krxmarecords.bandcamp.com/album/some-kind-of-birthday-party

The Brown Christmas Vs. The Bored of Education (Playing Catch up part 3)

The Brown Christmas is the perfect cure for your boredom; with ten tracks covering everything from ambient, synth-pop, to sludge rock, you're sure to be entertained. Enjoy the loosely held together chaos that you've come to expect from The Brown Christmas. You'll find plenty of composed build ups and steep energetic slopes on this short rollercoaster ride.

The opening track "Raven's Talons" grabs the listener with piercing synthy claws, cascades through hazy drones, and drops you into a nest where you're devoured by abrasive chattering. As the anxiety of the first track fades away the tone shifts on "Leisure Speed" to a kind of triumphant yearning. This track is one of those catchy, almost pop tunes that seems to occasionally emerge from out murky slurry. A simple melody punctuated by a bouncy bass line, and gently fading away with a piano solo.

This leads to probably the highlight of this album; a slow droning version of "Cataract Jack" that is both ghostly and beautiful. What is normal a frantic, zany jig has been stretched out and melted. Deep percussive tones echo the main melody at a snails pace, while breathy textures create a sense of unease.

"Cataract Jack" is a delicate veil gently blowing in a dusty window; contrast this with bellowing heavy presence of "T-Boned Semi." Lumbering along powerfully, this track's defining feature is the sludgy distorted bass playing by Joemazing. I set a steady pace with the drums and then simply enjoy the ride as Joemazing pushes his mixer to the limit, turning it into a crunchy fuzz pedal.

From here things get kicked into high gear with the feverish "Scarab Outrun." We're skidding along barely maintaining control, kicking up plumes of dust, and quickly approaching a summit. With the toll of a bell we fall apart and gradually float to the ground with the track "Course Winds Blow Brittle Reeds."

The album ends with a short duet between the Roland D50 and it's modern recreation the D05. It's merry, light hearted, and the perfect silly goodbye.

Kings of Slop (Playing catch up part 2)

We here at The Brown Christmas pride ourselves on our sloppiness. It is only when you embrace the essence of slop, and reach deep into the viscous bubbling depths that you can find unexpected mixtures of accidental beauty. This album was recorded at the very beginning of January 2018, after not jamming for over a month we were fully ready to get sloppy again.

This isn't your average 'slop flavored fluid substitute,' this is quality pure distilled slop. Every minute of this album oozes thick, dense, textured, slop. Each track takes its time, slowly spreading and changing its texture, while also remaining concise and not overstaying its welcome. Most of the album keeps a fairly leisurely pace, allowing simple melodies to slowly reveal themselves over shifting ambiences, shining for a moment, then disappearing back into the sloppy ether. "Luck People" is a prime example of this; jovial arpeggios and Al Santillo loops provide a thin surface for mallet textures to knock on, eventually shattering the surface and dissolving.

The tempo picks up briefly as the monolithic "No Body Knows..." comes to an end and bursts into the frantic "Martini Rodeo." This is an all out assault of drums, synths, and guitar feedback; eventually falling apart, and leaving only a wiggly bass line. My favorite part of this album however, comes when the soothing lullaby of "Magic Mattress Bliss" shifts into the uneasy fever dream drones of "Starsand Hourglass." A heavy bellowing kick persuades the listener along a winding and unstable path of echoing bells, warbling ghostly howls, uneven synth pulses, and glistening rain textures.

The final track "Cyborg Vacuero" brings the tempo back to a frantic pace, closing the album with chugging guitar riffs and a squealing synth solo. This album demands several replays and deep listening; for just 30 minutes there's a vast variety of sound happening. At the time of it's release in June, Kings of Slop would have been my pick for our top album of the year. It has since been replaced by a different album, but is still a great listen. Check it out, taste the slop.

Walter Westinghouse (Playing catch up part 1)

I have fallen quite behind on these album write ups, but I suppose that's what happens when releasing new alums monthly, while also working on other projects, working a day job, and moving. So now let's see if I can get caught up.

With the recent passing of Hardy Fox from The Residents, it seems fitting to be starting with our  "Walter Westinghouse' cover album. The Residents have always been a favorite band of ours, they're probably the reason we started playing music together in the first place. So we jumped at a chance to be a part of their "I am A Resident" compilation contest.

We wanted to choose a song that was more of a deep cut, rather than going for something well known like 'Hello Skinny.' Walter Westinghouse was the perfect choice since the original is fairly long with a very simple skeleton that we were able to jam out on. The back and forth dialog of the original also gave both Joemazing and myself a chance to do funny voices.

As with most instances where we've tried to do something deliberate and constricted to a theme or time limit, it spiraled out of our control and out of bounds of the set parameters. What was suppose to be a recording session for one song quickly turned into a +30 minute jam session. Unfortunately we did not make the cut to the compilation album, so we took our submission and the additional jams and turned them into this short EP.

Hash Not Hash

This recording session comes after a five month unintentional break, but I often find the best way to improve is by not practicing. All our creative energy gets backed up, until the floodgates are finally opened and then the desire is to make up for lost time. Hash Not Hash is a clear example of this, being a huge leap forward from Tropical Fruits, and covering fresh sonic ground.

The album starts with the sullen, down tempo ballad "Blue City Rain Storm." This track's mixture of synthpop-esque melodies and harsh textures of noise exemplify a new direction our sound has been branching into lately. While not entirely new (we've certainly done catchy pretty sounding stuff with noisy elements previously) this is a juxtaposition that we've been delving into more deeply.

You can hear something similar on display in the track "Sleep Paralysis;" which concludes a mostly continuous, dream themed section of the album. Instead of synthpop elements we have a very delicate ambient soundscape drifting on an deep abrasive undercurrent. This combination is perfection to my ears, and definitely my top track for this release. A close second would be the closing track, which is an extremely cinematic interpretation of our classic "Cataract Jack."

For those with a discerning ear for synthesizers you'll also notice some textures previously unheard for The Brown Christmas. This was around the time I started acquiring some vintage digital synthesizers. This album marks the introduction of the Korg Wavestation and the Casio CZ101 to my set up.

Three things

Here we go, catching up on the most recent three releases. I'm going to talk about them out of order since two of our recent albums have a very similar premise. I'll start with Tropical Fruits of All Kinds, released this past February; it's The Brown Christmas' taste sensation sweeping the nation and causing constipation. I believe this was one of those times Joe and I met with the intention of rehearsing for a live performance, only to end up recording completely new stuff instead.

Often times before I even have everything set correctly to record Joe plugs in and starts pumping out synth melodies. I'm certainly not going to leave a good melody hanging, so I quickly get the recording going and start jamming along. Before long an hour has passed and we have a fresh fruit bowl of new material.

When I listen to these recordings it conjures up images of late night adventures, wondering around quiet streets under lamp lights, and being convinced there's something magical or nefarious lurking just out of sight in the shadows. Highlights of this album include the whimsically upbeat "Out Drinking with a Friendly Moth" and the blissfully cosmic, "Asleep in the Stars" The former sweeps merrily up and down, riding a sultry evening breeze in search of sources of light. While the latter is a more stationary, sedated trip within and beyond punctuated by a deep sweeping bass drone.



The albums for January and March are both practice session of live sets. These are composed of new versions of previously released material. Volume one draws tracks from New Jersey Sound Machine and Go Ahead ...Call the Cops, as well as a new version of 'Nobody Knows what it's like to Eat My Dick Tonight." All this practicing and preparation and I somehow forgot to record the actual live performance. This is the next best thing to live.


Volume two is a large chunk from the album How to Make an Egg Cream. There are two takes included on this album, the first is Joe simply winging it and me messing a few things up. The second take is closer to what our actual performance end up sounding like. This time I remember to record it. It can be viewed here. www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3KHFw_VeV0

Both of the takes had their interesting aspects and since the only songs we have multiple versions of are "Nobody knows..." and "Cataract Jack" I figured I might as well include both versions of everything.

Christmas 2017

Although our name is The Brown Christmas we are not, nor have we ever been, a 'Christmas' band. That said I always look forward to putting out a new Christmas album. There's such a wealth of material to draw from, and it's always fun to 'get in the spirit' with some mangled Christmas merriment.

I have noticed that on every Christmas album we put out there's always an exceptionally abrasive song, usually with me screaming over a wall of sound. This time it's a cover of "Hey Santa," which is my personal favorite on this release. I was trying to pull up the lyrics for the Carnie and Wendy Wilson "Hey Santa," but instead got the Straight No Chaser "Hey Santa." Shortly after I started screaming I realized my error, but there was nothing to do but to continue belting out lyrics to a song I've never heard before.

The title comes from an event several years ago when I was working retail. Christmas was over, all our holiday merchandise went on sale at increasingly large discounts. Eventually items were 90% off and everything was gone; everything except a 4ft X 5ft X 18in display of candy canes. We just couldn't sell these, so I was told to throw them out.

Now my memory is a little fuzzy, but these were the typical boxes of candy canes you see for sale, I think there are a dozen or so canes in a box. I put these into larger cardboard boxes which might have fit 24 boxes of candy canes. I filled up about six boxes, put them out by the dumpster, then loaded them into my car when my shift was over. So using those numbers that's around 1728 candy canes. For the album title we used Thirty-six since in seemed like a funny, yet still plausible number.

Only a few days into having these at home did I realize that neither my family nor myself particularly enjoyed candy canes. However I think you will enjoy this album.

Haulin' Oats

Whether you're a Quaker or a baker, if you've got oats you need hauled The Brown Christmas can get it done in no time flat. Around the holidays more than ever we get tons of oats that need hauling; and if you're speeding across state lines with a truck load of legally questionable oats, you need some good cruising tunes.

As with our previous album, guitar is featured prominently on Haulin' Oats. The opening track begins with Joemazing chugging away, before messing around with his guitar's faulty wiring to make it scream like a hawk. The synths and drums create a slow moving, lightly textured framework for Jomazing guitar to gradually melt over top. This destruction continues on "Mass of Choronzon," as I play some dramatic string samples and Joemazing screams and distorts things into an unrecognizable mess of feedback.

The tempo takes a more upbeat turn as a circus melody emerges from the ashes of the previous track. A deep bellowing synth line bounces us along drunkenly before building to a growling drone, as silly melodies dance around. The ferris wheel is rusted, the bumper cars are short circuiting, and the carnival barker is in a radiation induced rage.

Overall this album has an aggressive, lo-fi, abrasiveness that is best exemplified with my favorite track, "Missa pro Defunctis." This melancholic march sounds like it was ripped from a withered VHS tape; a simple but effective melody punctuated by drums, is made all the more epic when complimented by the thick analog drone that emerges about halfway through the song.

The closing track is another high point, and possibly the best version of "Nobody Knows what it's like..." we've recorded to date. We take turns belting out the lyrics as over the top as possible, and I do my best emulation of the drums from "In the Air Tonight."

That's about all I have time for, these oats aren't going to haul themselves! We've got deadlines to meet, and the oat hauling business is very competitive. This album is a great example of our grittier, lo-fi, noise sound. Give it a listen.

Books Suck

Books suck, plain and simple! You can't listen too a book (unless it's an audiobook, but that's just a book pretending it's a recording) they don't fit in tape decks and they're the wrong shape for record players or CD players. Music came first, music rules, books are just a bad sequel.

This album is the perfect example of the inferiority of books; there is no possible way for books to capture the essence of these songs. The driving kick on the first track calls the listener to adventure, an arpeggiated bass line adds a sense of urgency, and Joemazing's drones and melodies add an element of uncertainty and danger.

Things get a little hectic, but there is an opportunity to relax within the cosmic swirling synth tones of the second track. The stars are not entirely welcoming however, and the listener must avoid their supernova bursts. This moment of rest is short lived and the kick drums soon become jittery from all the delicious juice.

Joemazing's guitar work takes center stage, while I stack synth textures and feedback noise on our 10 minute post-rock opus "The Asteroid is Here." If you thought The Brown Christmas couldn't rock sick riffs and kick ass drums, this track will prove you wrong. This leads into our hard rocking closing track; "Sludge Cruiser." Who needs a distortion pedal when you can just crank your mixer up way to hot?

This album is the first release in a long while that hasn't been a single day jam session, and it takes us almost into the present year. There is one more album that was recorded in 2016 that's set to be released, but it's a christmas album so we had to release it out of order. The last 2 tracks of Books Suck are from November 2016; part of our Christmas album jam session. Since there's really nothing Christmasy about them, it was decided they would need to be a separate release. They were too short to be put out as their own album, but luckily we had another short jam session from January 2017 of almost the same length. These tracks were from a brief warm up jam before a very different upcoming secret project.

...But why are you hear reading this? It's so long it's almost a book, and books suck!

Listen to our album.

Stogie Fest

Vape enthusiasts need not apply, it's Stogie Fest 2017!!! In addition to improvising music, we also have a tendency to improvise dialog. This is usually limited to a few remarks at the end of a track, but occasionally we'll do slightly longer 'skits'. Aside from Brown 'til Dawn all our recent releases have hardly any talking segments, but I felt as if Joemazing and myself had some entertaining exchanges that deserved to be included.

Let's not forget however, that there is also music on this album! It seems we stayed pretty consistently laid back and upbeat with these songs. Our usual detours into abrasive clusters of synth noise are absent, and while we do get spacey we never quite get spooky. Things get a little dark on "Cold Ghost Wanderer" and our cover of ZZ Top's "Tush," but for the most part we keep things chill and silly.

What else would you expect to hear while attending Stogie Fest? The audience demands mellow tunes for relaxing under clouds of acrid tobacco smoke. Wether it's "Sunset Hay Ride's" uplifting, melodic build up; "Picnic by Comet Light" with it's cosmic ambience over inquisitive arpeggiated bass; or "Swimmer in the Night Sky's" driving, forward flowing rhythm, this is the ideal album for wrapping up the end of summer.

Besides the afore mentioned "Tush" we also cover the Primus song "Mr. Krinkle," and do another cover of Funkadelic's "Maggot Brain." You can also hear new versions of our own songs including; "Love Young Brown" and possibly my favorite version to date of "Cataract Jack."

So light up your stogies, catch a screening of Wall Blart, and get one more relaxing weekend in before your brick arrives for Wall Day.

Honey I Crunk'd the Kids

Presenting part 3 of The Brown Christmas' crunk TRILLogy; Honey I Crunk'd the Kids! Recorded in May of 2016, this is the only recent album to include all three members of The Brown Christmas. The excitement of this reunion comes through in the grandiose variety of sounds layered on this album.

Our sonic territory ranges from eerie ambience on tracks like "The Chemist's Ergot Wine" and "The Mother Sphere Rises"; the manic insanity of "Folie à Trois" and "Daily Exercise Regimen"; to the unmitigated abrasiveness of "Shark Toothed Horn." Where I think our progression as a band really shines through however, is on tracks like "Murmuration Amongst the Clouds," "There's a Home for Me Somewhere," and "Ravages of Time." It is on tracks like these where we direct our sounds into more harmonious, concise, synth-pop-esque directions while still remaining completely improvisational that truly show our growth and exploration of new terrains.

Everyone was operating at 110% when recording this session, there were no lulls in the music or confused meandering in our improvisation. Everything has it's place and nothing is lost in the mix, a real feat considering there were five synths, a drum machine, a sampler, as well as various pedals being operated by three people at any given time.

A few more highlights from this album include our noisy rendition of Funkadelic's "Maggot Brain" on which Todd's synth sound like 1940's news radio static, and "Joemazing's House of Pain," which is sure to be the party anthem of the summer. The album closes with a craig's list track, "Load Ranger." Normally I would save this for another volume of Dicks Pics, but I don't when that might happen and it seemed like the perfect closer for a rock solid album.

I would also like to mention that the cover art was again done by Michael Burke, who continues to create extraordinary visual compliments for our sounds.

Booty Sammich

Although our albums are 100% improvised, leaving plenty of room for unexpected sparks of inspiration to kindle, there are two themes that seem to emerge with some regularity; we like to call them: spooky and spacey. More often then not I am the one generating the spacey feelings, and Joemazing creates the spooky feelings, although this is not exclusively the case. Maybe the music we create just naturally lends itself to visions of slowly moving massive celestial bodies in an expansive void, and of dark otherworldly forces clawing their way out of dreams and into our waking life. So here is Booty Sammich; a little spacey, a little spooky, and always a little silly.

How to Make an Egg Cream

The Brown Christmas is equally skilled in the culinary arts as well as the art of love, our latest cookbook/erotic novella perfectly exemplifies this. These tunes are perfect whether you're in the kitchen or in the bedroom.

We are now in the final stretch of our unreleased catalog, all recordings from here onward are only about a year old. We entered 2016 with a auditory exploration that begins light hearted and innocent, leads to the triumphant sounding "A Thousand Risen Suns", then slows to a crawl. At this point we gradually enter darker and dark territories, reaching a peak with the punishing electrical sizzles of "The Crushing Weight of Nothingness." Eventually we emerge from it unscathed and can breathy easy again with the cheery, round-a-about melodies of "Scattered Rolling Beads of Light." Finally we wrap up our adventure with "Hundred Foot Strut," a hard grooving tune with a squealing synth solo.

A solid chunk of this album is tethered together with a deep, pulsing kick drum; keeping a slow steady pace while melodies and textures are exchanged. Joemazing's knack for creating interesting textures really shines through on this release. He lays down a nice skin of sound ranging from subtle spooky drones, piercing shimmers, to thick walls of synthy distortion.

It's not an easy task to make an egg cream, but with our new album anyone can learn!

Xanax Madam

Here's something short and sweet; Xanax Madam. This was from a practice session where we were supposed to be figuring out what we would be playing for a live set. It's hard to get down to business right away, so we figured we'd do a short improvisation to loosen up and get things flowing. I think we may have even had a set list planned, but we liked what we came up with on the spot better.

The album starts with our rather grim and droney interpretation of Sun Ra's "Rocket Number 9" (which we didn't play live) before shifting into the anxiety-ridden "Unique Panique." This track and "Nuclear Winter Solstice" were actually tightened to one song for the live performance, but now that there's no time restriction, I've allowed them the time necessary to breathe and evolved more gradually.

We wrap things up with two tracks which originally appeared on the album; Big Bad Bill Weinstein's Big Beautiful Women Barbecue BYOB (Dicks Pics Volume 5), which you can check out HERE!
Joemazing's crooning is far more aggressive on this rendition of "Love Young Brown" and we managed not to burst into laughter while playing this time.

It is also worth noting that this is our last jam session from 2015. We are on the final stretch of unreleased recordings, and everything coming out over the next several months will only be about a year old.

Go Ahead Call the Cops

I usually try to write a little bit about each album when I release it; this time I was a little lazy/a little busy and didn't get a chance to sit down and type something up until now. I also occasionally find it hard to write anything of interest about certain albums. Sometimes there are no funny anecdotes from the date of recording, no particular concept in mind for the album, sometimes the album is just really good, and there are only so many ways I can say an album is good.

 ...and this is indeed a good one.

This album definitely takes the crown from Dick Hz as our most aggressively noisy release to date. A large factor in this I believe is Joemazing's extensive pallet of synth and percussion sounds on Go Ahead Call the Cops vs his almost exclusive use of guitar on Dick Hz. While not necessarily abrasive the full way through, there are some softer and more melodic tracks that mix things up, when it does get hard it gets rock hard and sonically dense. The version of "Nobody Knows..." on this album is also one of my favorites, ending the album with a definitive slam like the closing of a book.

So there's not much more I can say about Go Ahead Call the Cops, except that you should give it a solid listen. It marks our 12th consecutive monthly release and we have many more to go before we're fully caught up, but I think this is a fitting mile marker for essentially a years worth of music.

Music for Short Fat People

As I clear out the hours of recordings from recent years and release them into the world, I began to think it was about time I got around to uploading our older albums as well. Here is the one that started it all; Music for Short Fat People. Composed of recordings from January to October 2005 this was our statement to the world. While it was silly, sloppy, and in retrospect maybe not be the most pleasing thing to the ear, we were quite proud of it at the time.

It's interesting to take a look back on something we released almost 12 years ago and listen to how much we've advanced. I had not listened to these recordings in years and I was quite surprised to find they're much more listenable than I anticipated. They're not what one might called "good," but I was expecting 7 minute tracks of nothing but a casio drum loop, clashing random keyboard notes, and piercing saxophone squeals. Instead the tracks average about 3 minutes long and most of this probably qualifies as music.

I also forgot that we used to try to 'write' songs. What I mean by this is we would write lyrics and then randomly start singing them during an improvised jam session; if things seemed to fit we'd practice it once or twice over the next few jams, and then call it a finished product.

My stroll down memory lane continued as I skimmed through our earliest jam sessions looking for gems that didn't make it to the album. It quickly became apparent that we truly allowed our selves the freedom to be complete lunatics. A fair amount was pretty musical, but there was a lot of literal knuckle dragging on keyboards, slurred stream of consciousness rambling, and maniacal screaming. Any normal person listening to us would have been quite justified in being concerned that we might need to be taken to the hospital.

The result of all this digging is just under 40 minutes of bonus material which is available when you download this album. These bonus tracks capture this insanity in chunks small enough not to overstay their welcome. A few of the more coherent songs in this collection are in my opinion, better than some of the stuff on the actual album. I'm unsure why they didn't make the cut originally.

While it may be clear that we had no idea how to play music (you could argue that we still don't) there's definitely something to the primal nature of it all. We were very much like cavemen discovering music for the first time. There were no arbitrary 'rules' of music to adhere to, it was all trial and error. One day three friends got together with a bass, saxophone, and some toy keyboards and thought; "This is the perfect recipe for starting a band." I think there's something charming about that.

-Michael


When we were recording this album, I would grow paranoid and destroy anything I wrote or played out of fear of being thrown in some kind of institutional setting. I am forever grateful Music for Short Fat People, for better or worse, stood the test of time. It proves that, this whole time, I was right in my actions of erasing any thoughts I had between 2005-2009. Including, but not limited to, that hilarious last will and testament I scribbled on a Quik Check catering menu.

-Joemazing


This album is not meant for people who are not both short and fat. If you are not short and fat, please proceed to turn off your audio equipment and leave the premises.

-Todd