Kings of Slop (Playing catch up part 2)

We here at The Brown Christmas pride ourselves on our sloppiness. It is only when you embrace the essence of slop, and reach deep into the viscous bubbling depths that you can find unexpected mixtures of accidental beauty. This album was recorded at the very beginning of January 2018, after not jamming for over a month we were fully ready to get sloppy again.

This isn't your average 'slop flavored fluid substitute,' this is quality pure distilled slop. Every minute of this album oozes thick, dense, textured, slop. Each track takes its time, slowly spreading and changing its texture, while also remaining concise and not overstaying its welcome. Most of the album keeps a fairly leisurely pace, allowing simple melodies to slowly reveal themselves over shifting ambiences, shining for a moment, then disappearing back into the sloppy ether. "Luck People" is a prime example of this; jovial arpeggios and Al Santillo loops provide a thin surface for mallet textures to knock on, eventually shattering the surface and dissolving.

The tempo picks up briefly as the monolithic "No Body Knows..." comes to an end and bursts into the frantic "Martini Rodeo." This is an all out assault of drums, synths, and guitar feedback; eventually falling apart, and leaving only a wiggly bass line. My favorite part of this album however, comes when the soothing lullaby of "Magic Mattress Bliss" shifts into the uneasy fever dream drones of "Starsand Hourglass." A heavy bellowing kick persuades the listener along a winding and unstable path of echoing bells, warbling ghostly howls, uneven synth pulses, and glistening rain textures.

The final track "Cyborg Vacuero" brings the tempo back to a frantic pace, closing the album with chugging guitar riffs and a squealing synth solo. This album demands several replays and deep listening; for just 30 minutes there's a vast variety of sound happening. At the time of it's release in June, Kings of Slop would have been my pick for our top album of the year. It has since been replaced by a different album, but is still a great listen. Check it out, taste the slop.

How to Make an Egg Cream

The Brown Christmas is equally skilled in the culinary arts as well as the art of love, our latest cookbook/erotic novella perfectly exemplifies this. These tunes are perfect whether you're in the kitchen or in the bedroom.

We are now in the final stretch of our unreleased catalog, all recordings from here onward are only about a year old. We entered 2016 with a auditory exploration that begins light hearted and innocent, leads to the triumphant sounding "A Thousand Risen Suns", then slows to a crawl. At this point we gradually enter darker and dark territories, reaching a peak with the punishing electrical sizzles of "The Crushing Weight of Nothingness." Eventually we emerge from it unscathed and can breathy easy again with the cheery, round-a-about melodies of "Scattered Rolling Beads of Light." Finally we wrap up our adventure with "Hundred Foot Strut," a hard grooving tune with a squealing synth solo.

A solid chunk of this album is tethered together with a deep, pulsing kick drum; keeping a slow steady pace while melodies and textures are exchanged. Joemazing's knack for creating interesting textures really shines through on this release. He lays down a nice skin of sound ranging from subtle spooky drones, piercing shimmers, to thick walls of synthy distortion.

It's not an easy task to make an egg cream, but with our new album anyone can learn!

Xanax Madam

Here's something short and sweet; Xanax Madam. This was from a practice session where we were supposed to be figuring out what we would be playing for a live set. It's hard to get down to business right away, so we figured we'd do a short improvisation to loosen up and get things flowing. I think we may have even had a set list planned, but we liked what we came up with on the spot better.

The album starts with our rather grim and droney interpretation of Sun Ra's "Rocket Number 9" (which we didn't play live) before shifting into the anxiety-ridden "Unique Panique." This track and "Nuclear Winter Solstice" were actually tightened to one song for the live performance, but now that there's no time restriction, I've allowed them the time necessary to breathe and evolved more gradually.

We wrap things up with two tracks which originally appeared on the album; Big Bad Bill Weinstein's Big Beautiful Women Barbecue BYOB (Dicks Pics Volume 5), which you can check out HERE!
Joemazing's crooning is far more aggressive on this rendition of "Love Young Brown" and we managed not to burst into laughter while playing this time.

It is also worth noting that this is our last jam session from 2015. We are on the final stretch of unreleased recordings, and everything coming out over the next several months will only be about a year old.

13 Piece Log Puzzle Combo Box Meal Deal

The Brown Christmas delves into some percussive minimalism with this click-clacky little number from the upcoming album "Where the Moon Don't Shine." Joemazing channels his inner Steve Reich, stacking loops of percussive synth hits to form this upbeat cacophony.

"Where the Moon Don't Shine" will be available later this month with a limited edition cassette release on Orb Tapes.